How Seventh Graders vs. Eighth Graders React to Raiding Area 51

Siena J and Mackenzie P, Journalists

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Mason Plieskatt- 7th Grade

  • “What would you bring with you to raid Area 51?”

           “My mom as a sacrifice. And Takis.”

  • “You’re at the gate of Area 51 and are surprised you have not gotten hurt yet. Do you go in or do you head back?”

           “I wait for the Naruto runners.”

  • “You’re inside safe; do you take an alien back?”

           “Yes.”

  • “Who would you bring with you?”

           “I mean I need a sacrifice, so Jeffery.”

  • “What would be your plan?”

           “First, the Naruto runners would take all the shots for us. As they’re loading their guns again, the John Wicks            will help us storm. They’ll bust down the door and kill all the guards and then we’ll push in and put an alien in a            blow up cage and bring it back with us. And then we’ll tie Jeffery to the nuclear reactor as sacrifice.”

  • “You’re friend is about to walk in but you see a guard. What do you do?”

           “Shoot ‘em with my takis. No, no, no- I shove a taki up his nose, right as he’s about to inhale and then he goes,            *makes choking noises*.”

  • “And finally, will you be participating in the event to storm Area 51 on September 20?”

           “Yes.”

  • “Have you bought your plane ticket yet?”

           “Yes.”

  • “When do you plan on leaving?”

           “Tomorrow.”

 

Joshua Kaminski- 8th Grade

  • “You plan on raiding Area 51 the day before it happens. What do you bring?”

           “My mom. And my dad. And my friends. And my doggos. And my dark, empty soul.”

  • “You approach the gate and are surprised nothing has happened to you. Do you go in or walk back?”

           “I go in.”

  • “Your friend is about to go in the building and you see a guard. What do you do?”

           “Boom, I shoot him with my dark soul.”

  • “If you were going to raid Area 51 what would be your plan?”

           “I go in the gate, and I would like, clear the area. Then I would try and get an elevator or some way in to the            right floor, that wouldn’t get me killed or caught. And then I’d see the alien and I’d be like, ‘Yo, Alien, what’s up?”            and then I’ll shoot like the window and then yeet him out. And now the alien is free, so they can kill me- it’s fine            now.”

  • “Who would you bring?”

           “You. And uh, Ava, Dasha, Hannah, Siena, and Alyssa.”

  • “You got into Area 51. Do you take an alien back? Why or why not?”

           “Yes, because what if the alien can help America’s economy problems?” 

  • “What does your perfect alien like?”

           “Okay, so it would be like all black and would look like a human type thing. And it would have like a face; it                      would be a flower shaped face, opened, maybe this is a demogorgon. It would have a lot of teeth and would                    make people like, blobbies.”

  • “Will you be raiding Area 51 on September 20, even if it’s cancelled?”

           “No, I will not do that.”

 

Lia Kang- 7th Grade

  • “You plan on raiding Area 51 the day before it happens. What do you bring?”

           “A lacrosse stick. Some chips and a bat.”

  • “You approach the gate of the building and are surprised nothing has happened to you. Do you go in or walk back?”

           “I go in.”

  • “Are you going to bring an alien home with you?”

          “I’ll bring three, and I’ll name them Ickle, Pickle, and Stew.”

  • “Are they going to be cute or really ugly?”

           “They are going to be made out of socks.”

  • “Are you going to teach them?”

           “I am going to teach them how to make sock puppets out of their own bodies.”

  • “Your friend is about to go in the building and you see a guard. What do you do?”

           “I save her life and then make her pay me.”

  • “How much?”

           “50 grand.”

  • “If you were going to raid Area 51, how would you plan to do it?.”

           “I buy a jet, then drop out of it, then knock out who ever is there, then I’ll steal all the aliens. Especially Ickle,                 Pickle, and Stew.”

  • “Who would you bring with you?”

           “Siena, Hayley, and a dog.”

  • “Will you be someone storming it on September 20?”

           “No.”

  • “What does Ickle, Pickle, and Stew going to look like?”

           “So it is a glove, and each finger is a little alien.”

  • “So your going to have five aliens?”

          “Ickle, Pickle, Stew, Tickle, and Jeff. Jeff’s my favorite, he is the thumb.”

 

Kaitlin Coward- 8th Grade

  • “ You plan on raiding Area 51 the day before it happens. What do you bring?”

          “You have to bring the essentials. You have to bring the food, the water, then you have to bring a leash for the                alien.”

  • If you got into Area 51 would you take an alien? Why or why not?”

          “It depends if it was cute. Maybe if it was nice. If it wasn’t I would probably just leave it.”

  • “You approach the gate of the building, and are surprised nothing has happened to you yet. Do you go in or do you walk out?”

          “I go in.”

  • “Your friend is about to go in the building and you see a guard, what do you do?”

          “You bring them and then you run.”

  • “How would you plan to raid?”

          “You have to have a lot of people so if they shoot at you they won’t hit you. You get a bunch of people so you are           just an unstoppable force.”

  • “Who would you bring?”

          “ Why don’t we just get like to whole school. Maybe if we all come then we don’t have to go to school.”

  • “ Will you be one of the people raiding Area 51 on September 20, 2019?”

          “Oh no, of course not.”